Ignoring God

Have you ever ignored God? Has He ever told you something so contrary to what you have been raised to believe that you just want to flee? You fear the reaction of those around you so much and the Church you were raised in that you just remain silent. Well, I now find myself in that place. How long I will remain in this place of silence I do not know, sometimes I wonder if it really was God. I now know what it feels like to be a coward or is this self-preservation.